So I’m not dead, not missing, heck not even living an exciting dating life lol. I’ve been busy being sick, getting tests and on top of it all moving.
I’m also on my stupid phone, (God bless instant access technology on demand). So this post will be kinda short as I’m waiting for Cable One to get off their asses and hook up my internet between the hours of inconvenient and idiotically late on only the second Thursday of every other odd numbered month.
As the title probably suggests, since my last post I’ve been diagnosed. After an ambulance trip, an er visit, multiple MRI’s and a spinal tap; the doctors have found enough to confirm their suspicions. I have lesions in the brain, a few on the spine and the affirmative was a positive cerebral spinal fluid sample.
I found out on Monday and it still has not sunk in. “You have multiple sclerosis” uh huh……. yeah, OK was something of my reply. “Less than half a million people in the US have it” uh huh, yeah great, so am I supposed to feel special or something? “There is no cure, we can only hope to slow down its progression” ohhh ok, so I might have to figure out how to accesorize a cane and still make it in the shark infested dating scene…. great.
He handed me 10 pounds of stuff to read, a script for legal speed and muscle relaxants and told me to study and chose my therapy. Woohoo I get to chose What poison I wish to inject myself with on a daily basis for the rest of my life! I feel like I won the lottery!
So yeah, a bit sarcastic here. Like I said I haven’t even come to terms with it. At times I’m upset, indifferent, relieved or like today just angry and pissed.
So That’s where I am right now. Waiting for internet in my new place and angry at the moment. Trying to figure out when in God’s name I can feel normal enough to go out and have fun, cause Lord knows I need it.
I don’t have anything witty or insightful to say but I wanted you to know that your disclosure above was read and understood and that it made my heart contract….